One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God,
"Lord, I have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you created me and provided this
beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals and that hilarious comedic
snake, but I'm just not happy."
"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above.
"Lord, I am lonely and I'm sick to death of these
apples."
"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall
create a man for you."
"What's a man, Lord?"
"This man will be a flawed creature with many bad
traits. He'll lie, cheat and be vain; all in all, he'll give you a hard time,
but he'll be bigger, faster and will like to hunt and kill things. He will look
silly when he's aroused, but since you've been complaining, I'll create him in
such a way that he will satisfy your physical needs. He will be witless and
will revel in childish things like fighting and kicking a ball about. He won't
be too smart, so he'll also need your advice to think properly."
"Sounds great." says Eve, with an ironically
raised eyebrow. "What's the catch, Lord?"
"Well, you can have him on one condition."
"What's that, Lord?"
"As I said, he'll be proud, arrogant and self-admiring,
so you'll have to let him believe that I made him first. Just remember, it's
our little secret..."
"You know, woman to woman."