HOW MANY DOGS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB
ROTTWEILER: Just one. You want to make something of it?
DOBERMAN: Immediately decides to change the brand of light
bulb and
find a more efficient form of lighting -- perhaps a
fluorescent bulb.
AUSTRALIAN SHEPHERD: One, but just "try" to
convince them that the
burned-out bulb is useless and should be thrown away.
JACK RUSSELL TERRIER: Two, but the job never gets done --
they just
keep arguing about who is supposed to do it and how it's
supposed to
be done!
BULLDOG: Just one. But it takes them three years to do it.
POMERANIANS don't change light bulbs, although sometimes
their agent
will get a German Shepherd in to do the job for them while
they're
out.
PUG: Er, two. Or maybe one. No -- on second thought, make
that
two. Is that OK with you?
GOLDEN RETRIEVER: The sun is shining, the day is young,
we've got
our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying
about a
stupid burned-out light bulb?
AFGHAN: Light bulb? What light bulb?
CAT: I don't waste my time with these childish jokes.
SHIBA-INU: Zero! Shiba's aren't afraid of the dark!
SCHIPPERKE: It's your light bulb -- change it yourself.
Unless.....
is there food involved??
POODLE: Sorry, Just had my nails done.
BEAGLE: How many cookies do I get?
WEIMARANER: Light bulb? You want ME to change a LIGHT BULB?
LAB: Why change it? The darker it is, the longer I can
sleep.
BASENJI: LIGHT BULB? We don't change no steenking light
bulbs!
MALAMUTE: Let him do it, you can pet me while he's busy.
BOXER: If I could stop wiggling my butt long enough to quit
falling
off the chair.........
AMERICAN BULLDOG: One. JUMP, remove bulb , land. JUMP,
replace
bulb, land. Two: What light bulb So? We can play in the
dark.
GOLDEN RETRIEVER: "I'll be glad to change the light
bulb for you,
but first can't we play catch with the tennis ball, or
Frisbee -- and
then I want to lick your face and rest my head in your lap
and look
up at you with my sad eyes. What, you're changing the light
bulb
yourself -- you didn't have to do that -- but I looooove you
so much
for being my friend and doing that."
DALMATIAN: Just one, but it will really hate the new bulb.
ROTTWEILER: I'll change the light bulb if I can eat the old
one.
CORGI: I cant reach the stupid lamp!
SPRINGER: Light bulb? Light bulb? That thing I just ate was
a light
bulb?
STANDARD POODLE: None. Go get human, sit under it, look up
and
point it out -- then go lie down in disgust that it took so
long.
BORDER COLLIE: Just one. And he'll rewire the house while
he's at it.
WOLFDOG: Let me see that light bulb, anyway. What's it made
of,
what's inside of it, what will happen if I drop it. I might
change
it, but let me think about it. You're not trying to tell me
what to
do, are you? Hey, I just had a great idea. I think I'll
change that
light bulb!
GERMAN SHEPHERD: "I'm kinda busy right now! I have to
chase the
cat, protect the kids, herd the horses, beg for food and
take a nap.
I'll add the light bulb to my "To Do"
list...."
DACHSHUND: Well, first get me a ladder and a treat...... no,
you
took too long. I want TWO treats and I'll do it......... No,
not
that treat, the other kind. Geez.......... do I have to do
everything? (of course, followed by "the look".)
IRISH SETTER: It only takes one, but it will put in a really
dim
bulb.
PIT BULL TERRIER: Jump and take hold of old light bulb. Now,
let go
of old light bulb.......... I said LET GO OF LIGHT BULB.
Please????
Let go of the light bulb??????
GOOD OL' SOUTHERN HOUND DOG: Huh????