The best jokes about doctors, the best jokes, JOKES about doctors , the best of nurses jokes!
In a clinic, a doctor makes his tour of the rooms, when he comes across a guy masturbating violently. Shock, he calls a nurse and asks what's going on. The nurse answers him:
- This gentleman suffers from a rare disease, which causes an overproduction of sperm in the testicles. If this man does not masturbate every two hours, his testicles can explode and he can die in excruciating pain ... The doctor is surprised, but continues his tour and two rooms further, here is a nurse sucking a patient as if his life depended on it! He recalls the nurse and asks him:
- And that what is it ?
- The same thing, but he has an excellent mutual ...
It is not going well at all
- Doctor, that's not good at all. When I press my heart, it hurts me. When I feel my liver, the pain is intense, and when I touch my belly, it hurts me too. Do you have an idea of what I have?
- Yes, sir, the broken finger.
Alphonse, 75, goes to see his doctor for a sperm analysis.
His doctor gives him a small bottle and tells him to come back the next day for analysis.
The next day, the man gives him the bottle; Empty and clean. The doctor asks him why.
- Hey! Well, here, doctor. I tried with the right hand, without success. With the left hand, nothing. So, I asked my wife to help me. She tried with the right hand then the left. Always nothing. Then she tried with the mouth, with her teeth, without her teeth. Still without success. So, we asked the young neighbor who tried with the right hand, the left, with her mouth, with her teeth, without her teeth ...
The doctor, shocked, interrupts him:
- You even ask the help of the neighbor? ...
- Hey! yes, doctor. You see, we tried everything and we still could not open this fucking bottle!
At the hospital, a beautiful young woman waiting in the corridor on her stretcher before being taken to the operating room for a small surgery. She worries a little anyway, especially since the clock is ticking. A guy in a white coat approaches, lifts the sheet that covers it and examines his naked body. He folds the sheet, moves away to other white coats and discusses.
A second in a white coat approaches, lifts the sheet and examines it. Then he leaves again.
When the third white blouse approaches, raises the sheet, and scrutinizes it, the young woman becomes impatient: "It is all beautiful these auscultations, but when will you operate?"
The man in the white coat shrugs: "I have no idea, we painted the hallway. "