THE
10 COMMANDMENTS OF MARRIAGE
Commandment 1.
Marriages are made in heaven. But
so again, are thunder and lightning.
Commandment 2.
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict
attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
Commandment 3.
Marriage is grand -- and divorce is
at least 100 grand!
Commandment 4.
Married life is very frustrating.
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
In the second year, the woman
speaks and the man listens. In the third
year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
Commandment 5.
When a man opens the door of his car for his
wife, you can be sure of one thing:
Either the car is new or the wife is.
Commandment 6.
Marriage is when a man and woman
become as one; The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
Commandment 7.
Before marriage, a man will lie
awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before
you finish.
Commandment 8.
Every man wants a wife who is
beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.
Commandment 9.
Marriage and love are purely matter
of chemistry. That is why wife treats
husband like toxic waste.
Commandment 10.
A man is incomplete until he is
married. After that, he is finished..
Bonus Commandment story.
A long married couple came upon a
wishing well. The wife leaned over, made
a wish and threw in a penny. The husband
decided to make a wish too. But he
leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned. The wife was stunned for
a moment but then smiled,
"It really
works!"